The Castle
by Catann
Summary: Cimorene walks into an ancient castle. What adventures might befall her there?
1. Ch 1 In Which Is A Beginning

Author's Beginning Junk

Disclaimer: I own only what is not recognized as someone else's already.

I dedicate this to the semi-nice weather we're finally having here in the "mucca".

**Chapter 1**

**In which there is a castle...**

The castle was dark. And scary. Rustling noises come from all around. **_Not_** the most comfortable place to be. The girl, dressed in normal attire (for a snotty rich princess, I suppose), was walking very quietly. Well, as quietly as you can wearing a long dress and pounds of jewelry. She was obviously an outsider, seeing as there hadn't been a human here for 500 years. My first instinct was to attack her -- like that would do any good. My second, to follow her and see what she was doing here. That probably wouldn't work either-I was not known for being quiet. The instinct I decided to act upon was my third one: when she got to the stairs (a great veiw point) I would be sitting there, waiting for her. **_IF_** she was anything like the princesses from 500 years ago, she would probably scream and faint. That would be fun, I hadn't seen anyone scream and faint for so long...


	2. Ch 2 Which Includes a Meeting

Author Stuff:

Dedicated to school! I'm so happy it started again!

Disclaimer: I own anything that you don't recognize. Right now that is rather limited.

. Setting: Between 2nd and 3rd books

Chapter 2

Which Includes A Meeting

My intuition was disappointed. The girl didn't shriek or scream or faint or even gasp. She looked a little suprised, but only for a moment. The long dark hair seemed to move in the dim lighting of the old castle, which just added to the sense of mystery. Then she got all thoughtful and seemed to be figuring out the answer to the question of life. (A/N: Which, by the way, is answered in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy) After she had thought for several moments, the girl turned very diplomatic, further giving away her princessness, and said, in a very polite voice, "Greetings. I am Cimorene, from the kingdom of Linderwall. I wish you luck and good fortune on all your ventures." This Cimorene had obviously been trained by a dragon. She knew the correct way to greet an unknown creature.

I twitched my tail. There wasn't much else I could do about anything right now. The very rules of procedure and ettiquette demanded... Oh, since when had I ever cared about ettiquette? "What are you doing here, princess?"

Now Cimorene really looked suprised. "How... did you...?"

"Girl, when you've lived as long as I have, some things you're just gonna know. And don't try to get any special treatment out of me, because I don't care a smidgen for such menial things as status." My tail lashed and my eyes narrowed as I gave her a look telling her exactly what would happen to her if she tried. She seemed unflustered, but then, she did have the aura of a dragon princess. "My neice is the one who started your little royal family, and let me tell you, except for the dress, you look exactly as she did on that very fateful day. And I'm not losing my memory. The spell can only be broken by 'no man, nor any but a direct descendant of Kaliximiniona.' Of course, we figured out centuries ago that the spell maker had meant a girl, since they are usually very unlikely to come near an abandoned castle, let alone dare go inside. So, Cimorene, come here and tap my forehead twice, and say '_coretha athlirdfogi gfhaov orhtanv artjnertnewfkj vakjdhsxfgggaiiisifikatailsayoihebba_.'"

Cimorene climbed the stairs, tapped my forehead, and said the magic words. With a sprinkling of dirt, and an extremely strong smell of sewege, ...

HEY! Thanks for the reveiw! I have to go now, have fun with the cliffie!


	3. Ch 3 In Which THere is a Change

Disclaimer: I own the unrecognized stuff. All things recognizable belong to someone who's creative mind powers are supreme.

Dedication: I dedicate this to all the people who have tried to keep me from doing this, but have obviously failed. These people are, of course, my teachers, assigning horrendously annoying homework, and giving me many headaches.

Chapter 3

In Which There is a Change

...I grew. The process of changing from one thing to another is very uncomfortable. My tail, which I had grown rather attached to in the last 500 years, shrank, disappearing into my newly modified back side. All the bones in my body shifted, grating against one another most painfully. Some bones evaporated, a few new ones emerged. Pretty soon, I was a five foot nine inch, dark blonde haired, blue eyed girl, laying curled up in a ball on the top step of a very old castle, wearing clothes that hadn't been stylish for centuries, moaning in pain.

"Oh, dear! Are you all right? I thought you were a cat! Was that very painful? I'm s--!"

"NO, I'm not all right, and YES, that was EXCRUCIATINGLY painful! You had better be sorry! I HATE pain! You little _mumble grumbl muneht dhta dhaonwthbyicn tjas kertbais rtbalisdug asdg ajsdflktientyv visdfgnoi a sdogaoewrnliujghbn dkhaa! Amdfk ant vj agalhovhalet skldjf oktin c asdjgbtqgitie etbkdga!"_ I continued muttering curses in the Old Tongue, which hardly anyone had known in my day, let alone now. "_Shrumvbndaweo asdtva rht avit; asjdghkbrtakdfa rtjkdfhahathuvbhbt udqbtlab ethahfa lt lhtiqt l ldjsfhiauh aaaaaaaaghenaiueorenoeooo goterreddifhob gho---._"

"Excuse me for interrupting, but it isn't very polite to mutter when you know I won't understand. Though I did catch some of what you said, the dragons taught me a little Old Tongue."

I stretched myself out of my fetal position and slowly (to dramatize my enduring agony) sat up to face Cimorene. "Child, if you think I give a hoot for the rules of etiquette or politeness, you have another think coming. I have rarely conformed, which is why both you and I are here. If I had conformed, that wizard would never have gotten angry at Father, and he would never have cursed all the inhabitants of this stinky little stone building to live- in animal form, no less!- until some princess"- I said it with all the scorn a voice can carry- "found enough borrowed foolish bravery to come tottering in here and break a smelly spell that would have been otherwise avoided. Since all 5,464,451 people who were in this place at the time of the casting were still in here when you freed us, you now have enough people on your hands to start a small country. Unless you want a mass rebellion on your hands and the hands of every other human within 600 miles, you might want to figure out a way to carefully inject us into society. Which would be hard, seeing as most of them do not like changes and this is a major one indeed."

"But,... I ...how...where...5,464,451 people! That many fit in _here_? It's half the size of my castle, and we barely have 1,000,900 comfortably squished together! Uhhhhh...OH! How am I gonna explain this to Mendenbar? This'll just ruin everything! All our plans, all...OH, NO! What about..."

"What about what, Cimorene? And who's Meny-whaty-who-ha? You aren't making much sense at all, deary. Calm down, take a deep breath, and start over." I had no patience for panic. That is how I found out that Cimorene had gotten married almost a year ago, she was now queen of the Enchanted Forest, and her original country, the one that had been the largest in the world a few hundred years ago had shrunk to the size of a large state, over on the other side of the Mountains of Morning. And, the addition off five and a half million people would completely kill the economy, making it hard for future generations of kings and queens to rule prosperously.

Hey, hey, my happy readers! How's it going? I did a bit of bad foreshadowing, see if you can figure out what's gonna happen next.

PS: Longest chapter yet! A whole page! gasp


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